Peace at last

A bello fortiter certaverunt,

mortem cum dignitate

9/9/2015 14:15

Tough times

Paul  as asked that I take over and post the updates.  It’s really hard because there is nothing humorous about the state of things.

Things aren’t always what they appear to be.  As Paul said last month, if it could go wrong it did. Compared to his battle against charley, mine was a piece of cake, a walk in the park.

His first chemo triggered a reaction and caused the ulcers Paul didn’t know he had to flare up big time. That delayed the first radiation treatment for over a week.

Then things started going downhill.  Radiation treatments tend to sap your energy and in Paul’s case it appeared to cause some fairly serious pain.

Some good days, some bad, nut the pain was constant and it wasn’t getting managed to the level he needed. Between the pain, nausea and other issues he knew something was not right.

MRI/CAT scan whatever revealed lesions in the brain so that entailed a new course of action.  The gamma knife surgery was the best option at the time.  The results were somewhat as expected, after all it involved the destruction of some areas of the grey matter.

Nausea, loss of balance, double vision and that constant pain. Things were not getting appreciably better.  The next round of chemo caused almost as bad a reaction as the first but that was because the mediport had developed a staph infection.

The infection led to being hospitalized for heavy duty antibiotics.  But the real issue was the pain and the management of it.

Like Paul remarked, he thought he saw the light at the end of the tunnel, but he realized it was a 800 lb gorilla. 

The fight’s not over, but it’s getting tougher with each day. Like Margret said, the mind is still there but the body is slipping behind. 

If you want, now would be a good time to call and visit, but keep it short, Paul will let you know if he needs to go and he might ask you to call back after he has gotten his next round of pain meds.

I hate charley . . .

Odi illud rat spuria vitulamina charley

Route 66 and me

The following post is comprised of random thoughts, statements and observations made by bro Paul yesterday evening whilst he was somewhat still in the arms of Morpheus.

    

Current update, after the chemo he took a down turn, seems he might have been hanging around nasty girls or something, he has a staph infection on the drug highway that he is getting treated for now.

So, as he is installed in the doc box for a few more days, his boredom level is eclipsed only by the pain in his back. He stridently wanted me to let you fine readers know he is up for phone calls, 8 to 8, break up his day,  call him.  It’s OK, call him.

Take note, if he is really down or not in the best of sprits just say hey and get off the phone. He’ll likely let you know if he’s not up to a call.  Direct number -à  1 -806 -725 – 3774

Now for the drug induced ramblings of a somewhat deranged mind,  his and mine.

That damn highway is a national monument, venerated by thousands,  the go to stop on life’s highway.

The damn highway, route 66 a travel icon.  Now Paul’s at age AGE  66,  but that is where he noticed that the rules have changed. One thing for sure, he’s not a national monument, venerated by thousands, he’s just Paul.

Things hurt more at age 66. Getting drunk at a younger age meant an inconvenient hang over when you went to work the next morning.  Sort of a daily verification that work sucks.

At age 66 you don’t go to work, you be retired so you can get drunk and not have to worry about the next day. Except the hangovers’ lasts for an addition two or more days.

Paul seems to take the fact he no longer has working days he has the right to stay drunk. He might be on to something, another way to challenge this otherwise unpleasant rough road he travels.

As Paul remarked; “No more non working days, it’s a sign from the internet gods  that I should stay drunk during this ordeal”.   He might be on to something.

Shift geasr,  Paul then went  on to brag on Amber,  he was rambling at this point in time but something about kicking ass and going home in the same day.

 Making him look like the woos, He wanted a big shout out to Amber,  and I concur, way to kick charleys ass Amber!!

Shortly after that discourse Paul announced it was past his bed time, said he needed his beauty sleep and if I was up at 3 or 4 in the morning to give him a call, he’d love to talk.

FYI,  today I checked back with him, he recanted the 3-4AM call window.  But he would love to hear from you. So call!!

All comments greatly appreciated

Shout out to Amber

Voca me , ego sum ​​paulo sobrium

Thoughts and Musings of a Renaissance man

Guest editorial:  Paul, Amber, and I have been there, done that, or are doing that. Amazing how charley can change your priorities and how you look at life. It's just a little different. 

My mantra became "If they can't kill you or put you in jail, it's not that serious".

About the time I started to function again I found myself taking notes when I read, heard, or just thought up a clear concise evaluation of a situation. Sometimes you wonder . . .

I am now up to 14 pages, but here are the first two to start:

Thoughts and Musings of a Renaissance man

Comedy is simply a funny way of being serious.

Drinking rum before noon makes you a pirate, not an alcoholic

If I’m ever on life support, unplug me, then plug me back in and see if that works

Sleeping, it’s like being dead, but without the commitment

When you’re dead, you don’t know you’re dead, it’s only difficult for others, it’s the same way when you’re stupid

Sometimes I wrestle with my demons, sometimes we just snuggle

Of all the lies I’ve told, “Just Kidding: was my favorite

Bucket list, beer, ice, pretty much now I’m good to go

I see no good reason to act my age

You find it offensive;  I find it funny, that’s why I’m happier than you

People keep thinking I care, well that’s weird

Don’t ask stupid questions if you don’t want a sarcastic answer

Don’t grow up, it’s a trap

Barium, Cobalt, and Nitrogen,  That’s what I’m talking about

To Do List: 

  1. buy sword,  

  2. Name it kindness, 

  3. Kill people with Kindness

IRONY is the opposite of Wrinkly

Right or wrong, wrong is usually the fun one

I’m not a gynecologist but I’ll take a look

Animals taste good

Cleverly disguised as an adult

Annoy a liberal, use facts and logic

Alcohol, Tobacco, Firearms, who’s bringing the chips?

I tried it at home

I should have come with a warning label

The voices may not be real, but they have some great ideas

KARMA!, I have a list of the people you missed

You can’t fix stupid, not even with duct tape

If people could read my mind I’d get punched in the face a lot

The first 40 years of childhood are the hardest

My train of thought got derailed, no survivors

I speak fluent sarcasm

Of course your opinion matters, just not to me

Most of my great ideas get me into trouble

My guardian angel drinks

I don’t hold a grudge, I remember facts

Not to get technical, according to chemistry alcohol is a solution

Beryllium plus erbium, I’ll drink that

If you come for my guns you better bring yours

I’m sorry; my job is not to fill your life with joy

The voices in my head, they don’t like you

You look like I need another beer

That’s Mr Asshole to you

Did you eat a bowl of stupid this morning?

A friend will help you move, a real friend will help you hide the body

Seemed like a good idea at the time

In every old person is a young person thinking,  ”What the hell happened?”

Don’t kill them with kindness, use a hammer

My level of maturity changes depending on who I’m with

Hang tough Amber - we stand with you

Occidere Benigne Eisdem

Super Shirt Shout Out

I believe one of my Super Bros Has provided me with the appropriate attar for tomorrows Chemical adventures.


THANKS BRO

                                                                 

I think I found a pattern...

After all these weeks I think I have found a pattern. One day I feel really good, get a little active, apparently overdo it with an activity or two, maybe s visitor and BOOM..... I am shot on day two into day three. I am going to make a concerted effort in controlling my activity levels to a single day followed by rest.... If nothing else I'll get a lot of rest.

My eyesight is still shot, but everyone says the drooping thing looks better. Now for it to translate to the keyboard.

John stopped for a visit, Helped me get one of Anne's cell phones working as an emergency backup since I am down one phone.

EVERYONE 

Tomorrow is big day for my Ambi, Please what ever you are doing keep her in your  thoughts and prayers. Lets make this one less battle to fight. 

WOW - No way that was any fun...........

Talk about after affects. No fun No fun at all. Hopefully it was better than the alternative, Can't get up, can't move. Have gone from a cane to a walker...Not happy wrong trend.

I an in a complete"Brain Fog" as bro Pete would say.Nothing working, no energy, not a thing. having a really hard time  putting anything together.

 Four days and I have managed to type four lines..... This is not going well. Monday and Tuesday are a complete blur. Someone will have to talk to Margaret or Mary to see if I was even here at the house. Started coming around on Wednesday but it was slow. Here it Saturday and for the first time in a week I actually got up and got dressed and am trying to stay out of the bed.

Margaret has been a God send. Without her I never would have made it this far. She has saved me from God knows what hell.She deserves any and all credit for helping in my recovery. For you That are using the prayer list route, please put both Margaret and Mary on that list in gratitude of their support.

I have recovered enough from the knife fight that I do believe that the scheduled chemo on the 24th is a go. Just hope it doesn't knock me back to bad.

John is bring Abby to Lubbock this weekend (move for Tech). Said he might stop by for a short visit. Little does he know I have a couple of chores lined up for him. (posting that as a fair warning for future visitor). Actually not much more to say. Not back to a sarcastic attitude yet so I'm going to post this. Eye sight is still shot, so this post may be full of grammer and spelling error. Please bear with me (who knows my alternate EGO Bro Pete might correct) May post later if things change or we have a breakthrough.

Pablo

Ninja Warriors with Romco Knives

Guest commentary as Bro Paul is resting up after his altercation. Seems he had done got his self in to a gamma knife fight and him with no gamma knife.  Looks like he was out numbered.

Note to Paul, consider taking a gun to the next knife fight. Any caliber starting with the number 4 or larger will be in your favor. People will be much more respectful when they are aware you are carrying.

As best as Paul can remember, total time start to finish was a tad under 15 hours. Total time in the clutches of the Gamma Ray machine, maybe 30 minutes tops.  

Divide the total cost by 15 hrs and cost per hour is still pretty pricey. Divide the same by the 30 minutes of actual treatment, we talking high dollar stuff.

It hacked, chopped, sliced and diced and did all things anti-lesions. Results as reported are nausea, vertigo,(resulting in horizontal go), overall discomfort  and malaise.   

On the plus side, the doctors are indicating that the discomfort will lesson and get better in the next couple of weeks.

Paul is up for the odd phone call, just don’t call too early or too late, looks to me like he is keeping banker hours.

And I checked, he still remembers the money he’s owed.

On a good note, once again, charley got his ass kicked by the gamma knife, just as it should be.

Exitus acta probat

Let the Weekend Begin

Well, I am starting this post on Thursday but probably will not finish until Friday or Saturday. I'm sure there a multitude of individuals just waiting for the latest (tongue in cheek guys!).. Thursday has been slow, Nothing going on. I am learning rapidly that I really do like an afternoon nap. Down side, I seem to be getting up a lot earlier these days. Just waiting for tomorrow and the appointment with a team of radiologist concerning the Gamma Knife procedure on Monday. Part that worries me was their use of the term "team".

Had a phone call from Sam Ratliff today (Thursday). He has located some Grand Dad Fette pictures for me. We chatted a little, enjoyed the call.

Now early Friday, really early, Go to bed early, get up early. Damn it's still dark at 5:00 am! Sure can get a lot done (not really). And now it's off to the radiologist. Fun and games await.

Long morning at Dr Office. Seemed to go on forever, rehashing what was going to happen, when, how long, etc, etc, etc.... Took over 3 hours. Plus side, didn't have to get into one of their funny gowns. Four Doctors involved, this ought to be interesting.

Nice phone call from Pete this afternoon.Enjoyed immensely.

I am going to go ahead post this note. All is quite and hoping it stays that way.

Regards

Pablo

Getting a Handle on Things

Think that I am starting to get a handle on what I can handle and what puts me over the edge. Doctors visit yesterday morning was followed with a visit from Jerrid and Erin in the afternoon. Jerrid took me out for a drive around. Nice to get out of the house on a road trip that just didn't end up at a doctors office, radiologist, or hospital. We even stopped at Lowe,s and picked up a couple of plants.

Jerrid and Erin stayed the afternoon just visiting. Pretty much put me down for last night. In Bed by 7pm. Did wake up early though.

After quick visit with Ulcer doctor this AM, Sissy and Anne stopped by during the afternoon for about 2 hours. Had a real nice visit. Every bodies ear's where probably burning as we sparred no one.. They have brought the kids up for a trip to JoyLand amusement park. I had to politely decline attending.

All thing considered I think my tolerance level for a face to face visit is in the 1 to 2 hour time frame. Even with that short a visit, I'm going to take a nap.

Next major mile stone is Gamma Knife radiation treatment on 8/17 (all day thing) after meeting with radiologist on 8/14 to discuss. Film at 11.

That's about all folks, just wanted to be sure you guys knew I was still kicking.

Thanks for all the thoughts and prayers

Later

Pablo

A Shout Out to the Chief Bean Counter

I need to give a big shout out and thanks to Jake, CFO of the lake patrol and chief bean counter. I am in receipt of one care package which will be used in accordance of all rules and regulations as dictated by upcoming medical procedures, Many thanks for the thoughts.

Many Thanks

Pablo

Me, My Cane, and Granda Fette

Well, Here I sit doing nothing. Had a really slow day doing a lot of nothing. Cleaned up desk area as best I could, Worked on PC setup (very slowly) as I want to install a boot manager, only problem is BIOS version does no support boot from USB stick. Have work around which I am trying to implement. Also.working through notes and letters that have piled up, some up to  to 6 months old. Boy, Where does time go!

My cane has become my trusted companion, Take the dang thing with me no matter where I go. It is no so much for support as for balance. I'm finding those first couple of steps a little shaky without it. If I'm not leaning on my cane, I'm leaning on something (or someone).

The cane brings back the mid 50s and Granddad Fette.. I really don't remember much, but do remember being chased around Grandmother Seyler's house. Wished I had better memories but I do remember that cane in the air and Granddad Fette coming out that side door of the house. RUN RUN

Sam Ratliff did a spot on imitation of Granddad at one of our family reunions. l wish we all had cell phone cameras as I would have loved to got it on tape. Should any one have a still picture, please forward it to me, as I would love to post it. I don't have Sam's email address, so if someone has it could they get in touch with him to see if he does have a picture.

Well, getting kinda tuckered out here, think I'll sign off for awhile.

Regards to all

Pablo

Kicking Back, Taking it Easy

Have had a quite day, just kicking back and taking it easy. I have had no great issues to address health wise, my only re-occurring problem being the pain from the blood clots but that it slowly getting better each as each day passes, Pain medication seems to stay on top of it. Thank goodness for Margaret as she watches the clock and tells me when it;s time for another happy pill.

Margaret spent most of this morning trying to sort out my medication pill box and get caught up on all refills and such. Seems like every time I have an incident, it is a new pill or a change in pills. It takes awhile to get everything straightened out and documented. Could not  do it without Margaret. I also need a big thank you to Mary as she has been very supportive and helpful. She's really stepped up and helped out. Times like this you find out who you can count on.

A big thank you and shout out to Ben and Melinda for a nice phone call tonight. Got a chance to personally thank Melinda for her recent gift of lemon drops. She had read that they helped alleviate dry mouth when taking a lot of medication. IT WORKS. She was a savior when I needed one. Many thanks.

You all have a good one and get all your plans together for a big weekend.

As always

Pablo

I'm Back - Sort of.....

I'm Back at home but certainly not functioning on all cylinders. Taking Steroids four times a day. This messes with the blood sugar so now I'm having to take insulin on top of everything else. It's getting to the point where medication management is a full time job. Can not seem to concentrate on much of anything, good for about 10 to 15 minutes then I have to move on. With that in mind don' be offended if I cut phone conversations short, But feel free to call if you want.

It's bed time so I'm actually going to see if I can get a good night sleep. I'm going to close without a witty saying for this post, just can't handle it tonight....

Best of thoughts to all

Pablo

Give me a G, as in G for Gamma

While Paul takes a brief sabbatical from blog posting I and other guest editors will be posting info and updates.

On another note, I hate computers – the almost completed blog post I had been working on  is somewhere in the ether, lost forever more and me without a backup,  I am now destined to try to recreate the masterpiece that once was . . .

      

    ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Like Joe in Joe Versus the Volcano, Paul has a brain cloud, at least five of them. They seem to be the culprit behind the latest episode of nausea and vertigo that got him sequestered in the rest and relaxation spa in Lubbock.

Not necessarily the best news but only the latest challenge Paul faces. Since the good Lord doesn’t give you anything you can’t handle I guess Paul must be pretty damn awesome.

So the plan for now is to address the issue, and the solution is a mouthful,  Brain Stereotactic Radiosurgy.   What the heck is this?  To the interweb and Google . . .

According to the Mayo clinic . . .

“Gamma Knife radiosurgery is a type of radiation therapy used to treat tumors and other abnormalities in the brain.

In Gamma Knife radiosurgery, specialized equipment focuses close to 200 tiny beams of radiation on a tumor or other target. Although each beam has very little effect on the brain tissue it passes through, a strong dose of radiation is delivered to the site where all the beams meet.“

 No word from the mustard clinic.

From what I have found out about the procedure it isn’t something I would want to do, mostly because they clamp your head down to the table and I found out I don’t like that sort of thing. Other than that it's a pretty quick work over.

Paul is planning on getting lit up on or about the 22^nd. In the meantime he is going to be going somewhat stir crazy at home.  He is likely up to accepting phone calls so holler at him. Don’t bother trying his cell phone as it’s dead. Call or email me for the new improved number.

I think this is part of Paul’s master plan:

stultorum calami carbones moenia chartae 

Ghost Writers In The Sky OR Doug the Tool Man Delivers

The following is a guest editorial: The views and ideas expressed may not be those of the blog owner and as such might contain massive amounts of pure drivel, gobbledygook, or bunkum.

--   --  --  --  --  --  --  --  --  --  --  --  --  --  --  --  --  -- --

Seems like somebody got the big head and took a vacation in the all inclusive Covenant Health Spa and Rejuvenation Center.

Bulking up on steroids and such, fine dining on jello and ice chips. Lazing about, staying in bed, and watching both channels on the TV.

Meanwhile, in Dallas where we be suffering under 100+ heat and high humidity, we know the drill; hydrate, hydrate, hydrate. And, as my sweetheart said, water not wine. Jeeze Louise, water?  Have you tasted that stuff? Shoot fire, in Lubbock it tastes even more vile.

So for the actual update, Paul is taking the cure again for chronic water shortage et al. But he be feeling better, in fact he has a tablet now so we might see something from him in the near future. 

I suspect if I was to visit, I might find that there are one or more large breasted woman nurses involved. After all it’s not all fun in games in a hospital, they like to stick you with sharp objects and other mean things.

On the home front, Paul may have discovered the mother lode. Seems like his son in law came for a visit and morphed into Tim the tool man. He took up the challenge of finishing up most of the projects Paul was working on and straightened up the tool shed. 

Now Paul and I are making a list of thigs we think need to get done so  Doug will have plenty to do on the next visit.  Trying to get Paul to add cleaning up my garage as a must do item. Dallas is on the way to Houston, sort of.

Look for  a post in the near future, Paul sounded a lot like Paul when I spoke to him today and I suspect he might be allowed once more to go home.

Everyone send him an email at least once a day telling him to hydrate. In the meantime, you can reach out to me if you want the room number to give him a call.

I hate charley, it’s scum of the earth.

nunc est bibendum 

Best laid plans of mice and men....

Boy, talk about things going to hell in a hand-basket!

Simple week, One radiation treatment on each weekday, treatment time 10 mins - total time including drive and wait, usually less than 50 mins, One Chemo treatment which includes lab work and doctors visit, less than 4 hour including drive and wait time. Looked like a good week.

Let see, Monday did radiation. Oncologist is next door so I stopped in to see about pain relieve medication refill. That turned into a doctors visit, who said it should not be hurting that bad. Something was wrong. Off to the radiology lab for a Doppler. Knew things where going south when the technician doing the Doppler suddenly got real quite. She said she was done but needed to talk to the doctor.

Next stop... You guessed it, back to the hospital. CAT scans, Doppler Test, etc etc. Not good.

Well got a bunch of new blood clots. Blood thinner not doing it's job. Go a clot trap install (something called an IVT) and medication changes. Turns out this problem actually has a name. Trousseau's Syndrome. So now we have two items on the plate to address. The cancer and my fancy new french named thing.

Went into the hospital Monday afternoon but got out Wednesday afternoon. At least the stays are getting shorter. Also got my pain medication refilled with addition relief - Now on a Fentanyl Patch.

Well it's Thursday and back on schedule. Got my radiation and followed that up with Chemo. Went pretty smooth. Weight still a problem so I'm going to start logging my menus and try and figure out what I can do to get it headed back the right direction. Brother John had a suggestion that I think needs additional investigation. He recommended eating a pound of bacon at every meal. Any comments (or suggestions)?

As Pedro would say - I hate Charley, But now I guess the big C for me can also mean I hate charley and I hate the clot.

Pablo

The Week in Preview

This is going to be a busy week treatment wise. I have radiation scheduled for everyday this week and a chemo routine scheduled for Thursday. Here is hoping that the outcome from this week is better than the last time I had chemo!

Bro John and nephew Darrell stopped by for a short visit Sunday. They were returning from their annual visit with Sharon's parents in Colorado. Had a good visit and did enjoy the company.

Now for the bad news. I'm not going to make Platoro. Just don't think the body is up to it yet.

Looking forward to good week and a big step in the recovery process. I am concentrating on trying to gain weight. The two hospital stays (in particuliar the last one) did a number on my weight. I'm at weight I haven't seen since I was in high school!

And the week ends.........

It seems like it has been a really long week for some reason. Medically the only thing that took place was 5 radiation treatments (2 on shoulder, 3 on right femur). Pain level this week has not been good. Seems like everyday I am fighting it, trying to get it under control. Probably one of the worst weeks I've had since they diagnosed me. I am going to talk to the doctor next week and see what we can come up with as a more definitive plan, Up until now all pain medication has been on a "as needed" schedule. May be time for plan that is a little more exact so I/m no guessing on on one pill, two pillls, one now two later........

Received a very nice email from Will. By virtue of his nice email and the reply it prompted, Will became the holder of late breaking news. I'm sure that for a few extra brewskies while he is cooking at Platoro, he will share this info with you.

I want to thank everyone for their thoughts and prayers. Just knowing that I have the support of those closest to me means a lot and helps me keep moving in the correct direction, It is comforting to know I have a long list of people that would respond quickly if I needed something

Later

Pablo

VISITORS

Sissy has asked a couple of time about visitors, I don't feel right about a blanket yes. Since everyone would have to travel some distance to get here just be cognizant of the down side.

I probably only good for an hour or two at one stretch. Being a firm believer in Pete's circles there is a chance I would get up and go to bed not really saying anything as I left the room. Sorry to Anne and Sissy, little kids are probably not good idea,

All that said and with everything that could go wrong, if your up to a trip I'm up to a little company.